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Mom Wars: 25 Ways to Make Things Better - Page 4

16. Friends. If your mom dislikes your friends or your boyfriend, try to determine what worries her about them. You may be ignoring some serious faults, or she may be blowing certain qualities out of proportion.

17. Sex. If your mom gets upset about the subject of sex, reassure her that you’re aware of the risks and responsibilities that are part of being sexually involved with someone. Be sure to turn to her for advice and information on this subject. Her concern is valid. Unprotected sex can be fatal.

18. Drugs. Reassure your mom that you know drugs are dangerous. Let her know that you are not a drug user. If she knows that you intend to steer clear of alcohol and and drugs, your mom will be less inclined to worry needlessly.

19. Clothes. You want to wear your oversized jeans; your mom hates them. "Parents see children as an extension of themselves, and they may be embarrassed by what you do," explains Mary Pender Greene, the Director of Group Treatment at the Jewish Board of Family and Children’s Services in New York City. Try to arrive at a compromise. For example, agree to wear your funkier clothes when you’re with your friends, but not when you’re visiting your grandmother.

20. Money. Negotiate an allowance with your mom. Discuss why you need the money. Come up with a budget for basics (food, school supplies) and extras (CDs, entertainment). If you feel you need more money than your parents are willing to budget for you, consider ways you can add to your income. Look into getting a weekend job or baby-sitting.


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