Dear Upset: Long-term relationships can become comfortable, but sometimes it's important to take a real look at what kind of relationship you have. When things change, it's common to long for "the way things used to be." However, you can't ignore the reality of your current relationship because of the way it was in the past. Deal with the present. Ask your boyfriend why things have changed. Maybe you can both reinvest some time into improving the relationship. Unfortunately, he may have no real explanation as to why things have changed. If things don't get better, you should reconsider staying in a relationship that's making you unhappy.